The Turtle and the Rabbit

(From 2/13/2010)

I have a long-standing belief that 99% of the people in this world are idiots. While that may seem harsh at first blush, consider the sample of people you run into your entire life. I am not talking about people you know personally because they tend to clean up their act for you. You are likely the one person they are not an asshole to.

I developed and tested out this theory with several detailed case studies throughout my life. I started testing in high school, further advanced this in college and have applied the theory in my work life. The real mystery is why people are this way.

People are self-centered, selfish is probably more apt. We don't often take time to consider what the other person wants, especially if they are unfamiliar. I was reminded of this recently on my way home. I was in the cross-walk on my way to the bus stop when a bus rounds the corner out of nowhere, honks, and almost clips me.

The next bus was just about two minutes behind; as I approached to pay my fare the bus driver stopped me to ask what happened with the previous bus. I told him what happened and then we started exchanging stories. When it came to my stop we remarked that the same bus which grazed me was now at the same stop. His chest puffed and his smile wide, my bus driver was proud that his pace and careful driving paid off "This reminds me of the story about the turtle and the rabbit."

I walked out the bus and was annoyed to see the light wasn't in my favor. I could see that a bus was only a block away. I rushed across the street cutting in front of the first bus. I dashed to the bus stop with time to spare. I relaxed into my seat; I was elated because if I hadn't made this bus I'd be out in the cold for who knows how long. As I looked out the window at the cars passing by another bus overtook us.

The thing about my theory is that sometimes you're that asshole.