All fixed up

This is what $330 worth of stitches look like!

People with chipped Ceramic Mugs...

Yet another reason not to wash dishes. I was trying to wash a mug and this happened. It didn't hurt, it's just really annoying.







I should be a hand model. I can vogue with the best of them.

My Last Two Blogs Made No Sense

Welcome to my world over the last month.

An epiphany!

I recently purchased a second-hand piece electronic of wizardry; aptly named htc wizard.

*********Interlude**********

My commute home is the jerkiest it's been in, well, forever. Thankfully I am seated today as this ride would seriously test my sea legs. This ride is already doing a number on my constitution.

It's Thursday and the bus is packed as it usually is on payday. I can faintly make out some laughter from the boisterous guys in the back. The driver appears to have met a long lost friend of some kind and has been in deep conversation with him for 1/2 hour. That may explain the herky jerky motions the bus has been prone to. Either that or the bus is learning the electric slide; Too close to call.

************

It's been over a month since my last post. This hiatus is not from a lack of material or motivation; I've been separated from my internet machine and my job keeps insisting on something called "results." My boss informed me that I don't need to subscribe to "results" but are demanded by people. I had a similar problem with reader's digest not too long ago. They keep sending me invoices for that rag*.

Back to my epiphany. On one of my many trips to the pisser today, I was thinking fondly of all things blog. It all started with bringing myself somewhat up to date on LBo's blog; that's when the jonesing began. That thought bubble exploded into what you have before you.

*I would like to formally apologize to the fans and editors of Readers Digest, its not a rag, but no one would believe I read "The Post."

(*) references brought to you courtesy of LBo and English 101. The rest is brought courtesy of me never paying much attention to english in school.

Election Predictions: Obama Wins in a landslide!!!

Yes, I said it. If Mr. George "two terms" Bush can "win" the Electoral College in 2000, lose the popular vote, and still somehow is able to gain the trust of enough of these United States of America to wield presidential political power then any win is now a landslide.

I would like to thank Sarah Palin for making my run-on sentences that lack punctuation seem more like a sentence fragment and also perhaps even more so coherent and such like the people in Africa who are hungry.

Democrats will sweep all seats in Congress; this includes seats that are not up for election. With this newfound power the Democrats will make the sweeping liberal/progressive changes that Americans are clamoring for: Universal Healthcare, end both wars (Afghanistan I'm looking at you), Working and Middle-class protection, free public education up to PHD, required public service and place tariffs to protect American Industries. It was perfect till I was jarred awake by my alarm.

Are "Green" jobs the answer for the American economy? Yes, but. I think it's a bully idea on it's face but is there room for America at this point? Many countries started down this road a before us, while we were deterred by conservative deniers. Of course I believe in good ol' American ingenuity; even though we are behind right now, we are a country of ideas and entrepreneurs. I worry that even if we do have success it will be short-lived. Companies worried about the bottom line and with no regard to the American worker or economy will shift these jobs overseas as well.

Even if my prediction fails to come true, we all have tons of work to do to help the next president. The only promise of the campaign is in us. We are the government, political power is given by us and we cannot give it up after November 4th. Get involved, bring a friend along. Politicians don't make changes, you and I do.

Tapedeck PC Part 1

Japanese Blue Steel

Ahoy lubbers!

Words you may find handy today

Addled -- Mad, insane, or just stupid. An "addlepate" is a fool.

Avast! -- "Hey!" Could be used as "Stop that!" or "Who goes there?"

Begad! -- By God!

Belay -- Stop that. "Belay that talk!" would mean "Shut up!"

Blimey! -- An exclamation of surprise.

Booty -- Loot.

Cap'n -- Short for "captain."

Cat o'nine tails, or just "cat" -- a whip with many lashes, used for flogging. "A taste of the cat" might refer to a full flogging, or just a single blow to "smarten up" a recalcitrant hand.

Fair winds! -- Goodbye, good luck!.

Grog -- Generically, any alcoholic drink. Specifically, rum diluted with water to make it go farther.

Grub -- Food.

Handsomely -- Quickly. "Handsomely now, men!" = "Hurry up!"

Matey -- A piratical way to address someone in a cheerful, if not necessarily friendly, fashion.

No quarter! -- Surrender will not be accepted.

On the Account -- The piratical life. A man who went "on the account" was turning pirate.

Rum (noun) -- Traditional pirate drink.

Rum (adjective) -- Strange or odd. A "rum fellow" is a peculiar person, the sort who won't say "Arrrr!" on Talk Like A Pirate Day.

Wench -- An individual of the female persuasion. "Saucy" is a good adjective to add to this, and if ye can get away with "Me proud beauty!," more power to ye.

Yo-ho-ho -- A very piratical thing to say, whether it actually means anything or not.

Welfare Queens II: The Golden Parachutes

Richard S. Fuld (Lehman Brothers) - Severance: 65mil

Chuck Prince (Citigroup) - Severance: 40 Mil Pension: 1.78mil

Stan O'neal (Merril Lynch) - Severance: 160 million

Jimmy Cayne (Bear Stearns) - Severance: 30 million

Welfare Queens

This unfortunate term was used by Ronald Reagan, the great communicator, as part of the conservative class/culture warfare. Images and stories were woven about people living like royalty off the government checks and cheese given to them. With that a whole segment of the American population, mostly single black women, were labeled as lazy thieving sneaks living off the hard work of regular Americans.

The term "welfare queen" conjures up a totally different image for me. I take a look at what goes on in corporate America and I see the real "welfare queen." The wall street players love to talk about their ideal of laissez faire capitalism. Corporations live happily off the the backs of the American workers and consumers while they evade taxes. They bust unions and exploit workers here and oversees; their profits kept offshore and they only give back the community to get a write-off.

Corporations and traders alike complain about taxes. These are the same taxes that built the roads, waterways, schools, etc. that they exploit every day. Without the rights extended to them arbitrated by judges and secured by the police their businesses would not exist. These fat cats sit in their boardrooms or private jets finding ways to screw ordinary Americans and fill their coffers.

What happens when something goes wrong?

It's happened several times in the American economy: first in the 30s then the 80s and now. The conservative policy of under-regulated, unfettered capitalism has brought us to where we are today. Companies who have been making money hand over fist for many years are now looking for handouts. In short they are privatizing the profits and socializing the losses.

The taxes that companies evade are now being used to save them. The American people are going into deeper debt to save businesses that are "too large to fail." So much like the welfare queens of old, these guys are collecting welfare (bailouts) through fraud and manipulation while living large off their golden parachutes.

The Ravioli Experiment

The recipe advised that i build a well of flour and fill the center with egg. I quickly found out that eggs do not like to be trapped inside impenetrable flour walls. In fact, they just run right through. I did not get a chance to take a picture of this debacle as I was too busy sequestering the egg back to the well.

My new non-stick board and rolling pin in action, sorta.


Hot Italian sausage from Farmers Market = $$$$.
Pasta sauce thyme oregano garlic = $ Parmesan cheese = $
Homemade filling = delicious

Sometimes a milk can is more than a milk can.

Wow that is awful round and flat!


All that work for so few?


The mostly finished product.

The rest is pretty obvious. I found that pictures of water boiling are kinda boring.

I tried the experiment today and it was delicious.

Who cares about politics?

I've been inspired by KoolRedd to write a some about US politics. My interest in politics and government did not start yesterday, but I was inspired to let loose my thoughts by his first posting. My earliest recollection of politics was from my father. He espoused many views from the corrupt government and entrenched power found in the islands to the corruption and entrenched US power structure.

My own coming of age occurred on one September morning. All the lessons of the past came in direct contact with my present. When I went to class that morning I was just another college kid trying to get by. When I got back to the apartment I was greeted by the stunned look on my roommates faces and the images on the TV.

That fateful morning was an awakening for me, not a redefinition of me. I say this to be clear that I am not a person who sees the entire world through the lens of that day. Rudy Giuliani used that day to redefine himself; that day he decided to use one of his greatest failures as a launching point. What sort of person claims any know-how when their principal decision put cops and firefighters at risk during a disaster?

First I will attempt to describe the basics of US politics and politics in general. Perhaps I will then tackle the word "change" and how we can really get change. If we are looking for "change" then what are we changing to? KoolRedd has laid down the challenge; I plan on answering.

Ceramic Goodness

The eXperience

I went to see Dark Knight in IMAX yesterday; It was my first IMAX viewing of a major motion picture. I think I've seen a couple of shows at the Museum of Natural History concerning solar systems or dragons or dinosaurs or some other fable.

The 39 story curved screen is kind of intimidating for someone new to the game. The worker at the door barked out instructions to get high and to the middle for the best viewing. I could do high but only arriving 45 minutes before showtime meant that the middle was gone. I was geniunely concerned that my eyes would not be able to compensate for the enormous screen. There was also some concern that without optimal arrangements the curvature of the screen would warp the image.

I was thrilled to find that everything was all good when the movie started. I was thrilled to be taken away by the movie without another thought about IMAX. There was too much to take in to compare how well this would fair on a regular screen. The joker was licking his lips, blowing things up and causing a ruckus all about the place.

Firebreathing Dragon

From Japan with Love

Yesterday, I finally received one of the knives I purchased from Japan three weeks ago. It was Christmas in August as I tracked my packed over the last week. I watched it creep closer and closer to me as I awaited the day of delivery. The Fedex guy didn't even have a chance to find the doorbell as I ambushed him before he could get to the door. This probably wasn't the first of time he's seen someone exhibit kind of behavior.


O my. It's lighter than air and razor sharp. I immediately became that chef dude from the infomercials; slicing cleanly through things I would later regret using as props. This ninja in training setup an obstacle course (tomatoes on toothpicks) and diced through the gauntlet. Before long, I was also lightly tossing cherry tomatoes at the knife and watching in complete awe as they were split in two.






When it was finally time to get to cooking I found it difficult to prepare food. Unaccustomed with such a sharp knife I found myself going deep into the cutting board. Cutting with this knife is like a papercut; so light and clean you barely know any work has been done till everything falls apart.







(Proof reading is for losers)

Addiction

I have a problem. I have a serious addiction. It all started off as innocent experimenting. I heard others talk and my interest was piqued. I can't recall the first time I tried, or even how. It was probably my brother though; he was in the navy and experimented with lots of stuff.

I can't help buying organic foods and strolling around farmer's markets. I know the days and and hours of each one and try to buy from as many stands as possible. Sometimes I don't even need some of the stuff they are pushing, but they look at me with the "I'm a farmer" face and I can't help myself.

It's not that I don't enjoy my trips to the market, I do, it's just that I feel compelled to. It's a fresh produce and other goods O.C.D. I get to talk directly to the person who produces my food. For instance I learned one farm likes to name their animals and print their life story on the ordering sheet for their meat.

It feels good to know that Chris was born on a sunny day in May and lived a pampered life with all the grass he could eat. He especially liked the end of the field with the yellow flowers and would lay there for hours at end soaking in the sunlight. It makes the rare bit of sirloin so much better.

There are markets and organic foods all over the place. Enjoy

(Not edited. Deal with it)

Addendum

Apparently Global Warming has jumped the shark. I read in the metro that we are actually in a period of global cooling. Forget the whole "New Deal" "Energy Plan" thing. This was all actually a mistake; I didn't calculate the natural cycle of the sun and sun spots or something. I stand corrected. It's time to hunker down with several winter jackets and blankets. Looks like we are going to need to drill for more oil 'cause home heating bills are about to go through the roof.

New Plan:

1. Donuts and bacon wrapped butter for everyone: You're gonna need to fatten up
2. No more shaving. Bears don't shave. Why should we?
3. Replace your spray bottles with the older better CFC kind cause we really need the green house effect now.
4. Last but not least is the huge bonfire initiative.

See you at the debates....http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/64ad536a6d

LunchTalk

I sat down today to have lunch with my coworkers as I do every day; fighting off the bees, spiders and ants that frequent the bench under the trees. At our last lunch the bees seemed to be more interested in my meal than normal. They are usually good for one pass before deciding that flowers are far more interesting. I had the unfortunate luck of finding an all natural brown sugar , they probably thought it was honey, mustard. Every bite of my sandwich was fraught with danger; a mouthful of bee is the last thing I wanted.

So I sat down with my coworkers and we began discussing matters of the world. We began with the deeper meaning of China being given the Olympics and moved on to America's meddling in every one's business. One guy says that we should take care of our business over here first and was quickly interrupted by another person who said that was not possible. He felt that we can't ever be perfect; while we are busy perfecting America external forces would be at play needing some sort of attention. To that the first guy answers "RMS."

The domestic policy discussion went quickly to what is probably the most pressing thing on every one's mind at this time, energy. This is where the discussion took a turn for the worse as well. We were all able to agree that we have a petroleum based economy, but that's about it. Well meaning individuals have some crazy ideas about what we should do about our energy policy. I learned that oil is an infinitely replenishing resource and that we need to look into nuclear power.

If Paris Hilton can publish an energy policy...
No I am not a possible VP pick.

HD's Energy Policy: A NEW DEAL

What America needs is a robust energy/economic policy that takes advantage of good old American ingenuity. A New Deal needs to be struck; a works program towards energy independence.

1. Greater investment in education:
1. Increased teacher pay
2. Increase number of teachers
3. Build new schools
4. Increase subsidy for student
2. Subsidize green projects: (Only naming a few)
1. Solar panel efficiency needs to be improved
2. Fuel Cell technology and other ways to store solar energy
3. Wind Farms
4. Electric/Hydrogen Cars
3. Rethink how we build our cities and homes
1. Solar panel for water heaters?
2. Design to take advantage of the natural cycle
3. Geothermal into all designs
4. Mass Transit
4. Conservation and Recycling

It is true that spending on all of these programs will cost a lot of money upfront. It is also true that we would be borrowing money that many generations would have to pay off. This is no different than an individual who takes a loan out for college in the hope of being in a better position later. A nation mobilized will undoubtedly come up with many great ideas that will make us a leader in the world which we could then reap the benefits of from within and out.

The Projects